My Heart in Words
I wrote a book. I talk about it a lot here, my novel, my editing nightmare, my currently untitled baby. I started this work in progress 2015 and also finished the 1st draft in 2015. At the time was on a break from school, so no job and was living with my mom. I was at one of the lowest times og my life. Writing was my way out of my reality. Everyday I got up walked to the local Barnes and Nobles, got my classic breakfast combo of chai tea, bagel, and yogurt, and wrote for at least four hours straight. I found harmony and peace in the routine. My mom lives in California, so the walk was warm and sunny even in the Winter. It become a very creative time for me. I felt new and ready to get back to my real life. So with Manuscript in hand I move back to Oregon to start editing and adulting.
I still currently trying to get editing and adulting down. I thought I would get back to Oregon start editing get a job and my life would take off. It did just not a the pace I thought it would. I got home tried to edit but failed badly. I would sit on my bed stare at my laptop and the get distracted. This when I started to get more serious about blogging and started this blog. I was getting lost in chaos of starting a blog. I don’t regret it just wish I would have gone about it differently. That’s post for another day. At this time, I was also treating finding a new job as if it was my job. I was super stressed and creativily zapped. I didn’t know what I wanted from my book. When I was writing the draft it was this explosion of ideas and concepts. Stringing that mess into something great was way above my field of knowledge. I had no vision, no voice and no idea what I wanted to say as an author, queue the self-discovery phase.
I didn’t set off on some eat, pray, love journey, but I did make a business plan, set up some goals. Stepped away from my manuscript, like all the YouTube videos and Pinterest infographic told me to, and got some perspective. I starred to read way more and learn more about the genre my book was in. Learned the rules of that genre and how I could apply them to my story. With some new knowledge under my belt and renewed sense of self It was time to do a read through. My manuscript as it sat held a lot of different path I could take. I just had to find the YA Sci-Fi survival story I wanted to tell. I had to figure out the questions I wanted to ask my audience, and what my answers would ultimately be.
I’m a huge sci-fi fangirl. I love the big questions that sci-fi books, worlds, and setting pose, especially those questions about human nature. My 1st draft was a chance to spill out all of my ideas and ideals but I saw my manuscript as chance to refine those ideals and ask some questions of my own. How can a relationship survive when backed into a corner? Can a sci-fi ya book with a minority main character be successful? What am I trying to say about race relations in America? These a just some examples. I wrote out a small paragraph on way I believe my novel matters and it ultimately came down to three things, representation, responsibility, and awareness. With my 1st draft, vison and voice in hand, I started to see my manuscript shift into something good. I’m currently editing my way to great.
I wanna write a great book so bad ya’ll, not just so I can be published and one day support myself and family with writing, but because I just want to see this project all the way through. This is not the first book I’ve started, its the third actually. I’ve gotten some chapters down for other series, but nothing ever came of them. I’m determine to make something come of this. I hope ya’ll will join me on the editing ride, till text time, create, hustle, and love yourself.
